My marriage is very important to me and it’s something I’m always trying to work on. Why? Because success in anything requires work. You can’t have a successful marriage without putting in some work. When I evaluate the role I play in my marriage, I consider the areas where I am strong and the ones were I need some improvements. One area that I will admit that I am trying to work on is appreciating my husband. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate my husband very much, but I don’t show that appreciation enough in comparison to how he shows it to me.
Based on stories or complaints I’ve heard from others, I know that this is an area that others can improve in as well. Below are 4 simple things that I am trying to do more of in order to really show my husband how much I appreciate him.
4 Ways to Show Your Spouse You Appreciate Them
1)Frequent “Thank You”-I don’t think we do this enough. Sometimes you’re so used to something being done with or without you asking, that you forget that it warrants a “thank you.” A simple “thank you” could be powerful! Remember that people appreciate when they’re appreciated.
2)Paying Attention-This is an area where I could improve. I didn’t realize how much I wasn’t paying attention at times until my husband mentioned a few times, “You didn’t even say anything about my haircut.” Embarrassing for me…especially since he notices my outfits, new hairstyles or other little details. I know how it makes me feel when he notices these things and compliments me, and this is how I want to make him feel.
3)Meeting Their Needs-This is where knowing their “love language” or what makes them happy is key. This does not have to be sex. It can be their need to feel loved, appreciated, fed, respected, listened to etc. There may be multiple “needs” but focusing on the ones that are the most important to them is very important. Don’t take this as if you’re being their “slave” as some may try to make this mean. Think about how your spouse meets your needs and the way it makes you feel, and try to make them feel the same way. It’s simple, and not meant to be complicated. We can’t be selfish and only want to receive…we must be willing to give back in return.
“We tend to want to “fix” our spouses so they can be what we want them to be, but we often forget that change must first start with us…not them.”
4)Showing Them Respect (especially in public)-I don’t know about you but I cringe when I see couples arguing or disrespecting another in public. It’s embarrassing. We try not to argue in public, and I think we’re both really good about showing each other respect regardless if we’re upset. Also, no name calling knowing that you will regret it later on. Try to be respectful even if you’re angry because not only do words hurt, but people talk.
That wasn’t that bad right?
Sometimes it’s the little things that matter and that sets your marriage apart. These are things that I am, and will continue, to work on. I encourage you to evaluate your relationship and think of the areas where you are doing great and the ones that need improvement. We tend to want to “fix” our spouses so they can be what we want them to be, but we often forget that change must first start with us…not them.
With Love,
